Calling A Spade...

Laziness is easy.

It’s essentially a guarantee;  as soon as I vow to write the monthly newsletter, I suddenly find myself playing tetris.  What?  How?  When did I--?  Oh nevermind.  So, I open a Word document, and begin typing my paltry thoughts...

Uninspired, I head to the internet and am captivated by that headline article about a teen who collects (er, rescues?) penguins, like a real-live Mr. Popper.  How did that even make it to the front page?  I wonder, now clicking through slideshows of the Happy Days cast reunion…

Rationalization is natural.

Upon realizing that I’m frittering away my time, I often feel instant guilt - which I quickly rebuff with thoughts like, “Well, I’ve worked hard for years – it’s ok for me to loaf a little now…” and “It takes time to write!”  However, those are just excuses.  I’ve never worked as efficiently as when I couldn’t afford to be inefficient (read: when I had a healthy amount of responsibility/deadlines), and yes, writing does take time – but honestly, reading about Ron Howard’s current project isn’t part of the process.

Discontentment is instinctive.

When I had a chaotic world full of demands, I wished for an emptier schedule.  Now, I have an emptier schedule, and find myself often wishing for fuller days.  When a doctor tells me I can’t drink water after midnight, I find myself bizarrely thirsty at 2 a.m.  When it’s time to go to bed, I abruptly feel inspired to do laundry.  When I’m listening to a mandatory presentation, I sulk at not “getting my work done” – but when I get back to my desk, that desire to get my work done is considerably weaker.

Work is hard.

I tend to rationalize, because I don’t particularly want to feel the guilt for my laziness.  Yet, to be perfectly honest, I still don’t want to work.

But, perhaps, we will rarely ever want to work when we should?  Maybe it’s simply a (difficult) choice, like so many other moments of choosing to prioritize the greater “right thing” above our current desires…?

 * * *

I have recently come to the conclusion that a besetting sin of mine,

all my life, has been one which I never expected – laziness – and that a good deal of

the high-sounding doctrine of leisure is only a defense of that. 

– C.S. Lewis