On Reintegration

And after you have suffered a little while, the God of all grace, who has called you to his eternal glory in Christ, will himself restore, confirm, strengthen, and establish you. - I Peter 5:10

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I was so afraid of reintegration.  Sometimes, for many people, it goes quite horribly and you hear all about those stories.

We tried very hard to stay close, emotionally.  We did everything that the books and counselors and briefings tell you to do.  We were pretty systematic and utterly obedient.  And ultimately, our reintegration went really well!  The first week was beyond honeymoon-ish, the second week was definitely above normal, in terms of morale and tolerance for each others' flaws, and by the third week things were mixed - but not badly.  We worked through it, and life is starting to feel pretty... normal again.

I mean, Husband still flinches and struggles in certain regards, because of what he experienced - and I'm quick to tense and accuse him of not understanding or not appreciating all I did/am doing.  We've talked to a counselor, once, and that helped.  We're having to be intentional about our reactions, maybe more than usual.  But, still.  We're not derailing, y'know?

I feel like God is simply helping us.  And we're trying to focus on the positive.  A LOT.  And have tons of fun.  I'm kinda bad at creating fun; I'm better at creating productivity.  (Well, kinda.  Not if my days lately are any indication, heh.)

But, we celebrated Christmas (in February) together! 

We went to the aquarium; Little One loved it so much, she couldn't scream loudly enough.

We went out to eat, and at more-expensive-than-normal restaurants, and outdoor ethnic markets  

We discovered Horchata, and Sierra Trading Post, and took long drives just to talk, while Little One napped in the back seat.  

Husband made all our food decorative again.  Even Spaghetti.  And he helps me use up the produce, (like cabbage.  how on earth do you use up a whole cabbage?!) before it starts rotting.  

And he made wee omelettes and oatmeal for Little One, every morning.  And I slept in.  

And she promptly started nursing exactly HALF as often, immediately.  It really was emotional.  And she started obediently sleeping through the night, as soon as we set her on our knees and told her she needed to.  Wow.  The impact of two, united parents is crazy.

Life is so much better with him home.  SO much better.  Everything is sweeter.  And more doable.  It's a little surreal for both of us to function with, like, almost no fear at all.  He got a little creeped out the first time we walked down the street, to buy groceries.  And when the neighbor's dog thudded against the wall.  And when they test the sirens on base.  I'm overly sensitive, and easily hurt/offended, and when we do have a fight, it feels like the end of the world.  Little One often cries when he leaves now, and signs/calls for "Dada!" over and over.  

But, we're doing this.  And it's not so horrible.  And I thank God.  I'm not arrogant enough to think we created this on our own.