Blogging in general is hard, for the same reasons that going to a gym is hard. Even if you love it, even if you love the results, stuff comes up. Co-workers invite you out for Indian food, right when you scheduled a swim. You get a sinus infection. You have to work late. Your girlfriend needs to talk.
Then, those time you sit down and actually intend to blog... you can't remember why. Inspiration? Whoooosh.
I'd figured out my own ways of circumventing most of these life-ish obstacles before becoming a mom. But now, there are new obstacles. Namely a profound lack of time, and - within that profound lack of time - a agonizing lack of schedule.
Now hear me out - I have her on a schedule. I believe in schedules. But, I also believe in growth spurts and teething and neurological developments and no one told me that these things are diametric to scheduling, until after she was born and my "We will have a scheduled life!"
Thus, when I use the first half of her 60 minute nap to eat, shower, dress, and turbo-clean .000067% of my house - intending to use the second half to compose/post a blog - inevitably, she only naps for 40 minutes that day. No joke. Every single time.
(And no, I'm not opposed to letting her cry! But sometimes, she's just awake early. Sometimes, I just guessed wrong. Sometimes "letting her cry" doesn't solve much!)
(Yes, I'm being preemptively defensive here. Pretty sure the whole world is critiquing my parenting these days. Sorry if you're a merciful reader and were not thinking corrective thoughts just then.)
So anyhow... it's tough trying to blog and be a young mom. Also, to figure out what to say, and how/if to say it. Or if it's just the sleep-deprivation talking.
Thus, honest blog posts like this one make me cry. Because I relate. And thank Heaven I'm not alone in my confused mullings. It's such a new season, being a mom. It's like all the usual mile markers are gone.
It's also possible we just need more sleep.
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