When I was seven years old, I hear a radio skit about a man who bought a machine that would give him complements and encouragement each time he pushed a button. It was meant to be a spoof, a funny depiction of people who have a high need for affirmation and who will accept it from anywhere it's offered.
I didn't get the joke. I thought it was a great idea. I still kinda do. I'd buy that machine.
So, when I was filling up my gas tank the other day, on a rather crummy day, it didn't surprised me to hear my own, self-congratulatory thoughts:
Look at you, you're such a responsible adult. You have a specific debit card for gas, and your wallet is all organized, and you're even washing your windshield despite this miserable wind and rain. Go you!
... Oh, please stop sobbing, dear Daughter - Momma has to fill up the gas tank. I know, I'm so sorry - you don't understand why the heat turned off. And your beloved musical flower's dying batteries make it sound possessed, I know. Oh, don't jerk the cord so hard - you'll break it! It just needs new batteries! I think they BX carries them. I'll get new batteries maybe tonight, later, if we can manage it, ok?
Here - see me? PEEK-A-BOO! Momma's RIGHT HERE!!!
Oh crud - gasoline on my boot. That's gonna smell up the car. Wow, she's shrieking now... ohhh... *Deep breath* You'll be home in five minutes. She'll be fine. She's just tired. You're a good mom. She's crying because she likes you near, and she doesn't like you walking away.
There, now you're driving. Hey, you remembered to re-set the odometer! Good job!! And you got good mileage on this tank - you're getting better! Woohoo.
Ok, singing loudly to calm daughter now. If only people could see me. Ha. Alright, singing isn't working - we're skipping the mail pickup and heading straight home - alright, Little One? Ok... we can DO this. We're almost home. Man, I'm hungry. But, you need to eat. And so do I. Hum. I didn't time this right, did I?
Well, good thing I bought some more juice and yogurt! Easy food. Smart Momma!
And so the days pass, a few minutes at a time.
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